Sunday, November 18, 2012

Beauty In The Eye Of A Father

I shook my head when I read the statement that  Oxonian Globalist writer Alice Robb recently made in an article in which she criticized President Barack Obama's choice to describe his two daughters as beautiful during his victory speech.  "It is difficult to imagine a president congratulating his sons for being handsome. So why was it appropriate for Obama to praise 11-year-old Sasha and 14-year-old Malia for their beauty?" she posted. 

My initial reaction after reading the article was that Ms. Robb must have had ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to write about on that particular day.  Then I reflected on my own children, and how often I tell them that they are beautiful, pretty, handsome, adorable, cute, and yummy.  Ummmm...the unofficial tally is roughly 25 times a day (give or take).  After all, I see absolutely nothing wrong in speaking the truth (wink wink). 

All kidding aside, I also instill in my kids that there is more to life than the superficial.  However, it is also critically important that they have a solid sense of self-esteem.  What better way to cultivate that then to show your child that you think the world of them?  

I could go on...and on, but I received an email this week from Corey Crawley who is the co-founder of an company that specializes in inspiring self-esteem and confidence in young girls.  His email took the words right out of my mouth.  Here it is:

As the Co-Founder of Pretty Brown Girl and the father of two African American daughters, I am shocked and appalled that our President would be at all questioned about giving his daughters adoration as it relates to their beauty. This is exactly why my wife and I started the Pretty Brown Girl Movement. A lack of nurturing, specifically from the father, severely affects the self esteem of any girl- but in particular, girls of color. In a world that edifies physical attributes that are opposite of our daughters as beautiful, if we don’t call our girls beautiful, who will? We should not apologize for giving our daughters the love and affection they need and deserve that encourages them to Dream Big and to remember that they are beautiful inside and out. Shall we rely on television, magazines or images of fairy tale princesses to define our daughter’s beauty?

The connection between the relationship a girl has with her father and her overall self esteem is extremely significant. As the father is the first to teach a girl how special she is, this is a bond that should be handled with care. Equally important, is for Fathers to let their daughters know that they are intelligent and capable of reaching all of their goals and dreams. I believe, however, in a world that puts so much pressure and emphasis on girls and women as it is related to unrealistic images and ideals of beauty, it is imperative that Fathers stand in the gap to let their little girls know that they are beautiful inside and out. Most women who seek attention in negative ways rarely had the proper love and nurturing from their own fathers. If a father or father-figure was not present or involved in the raising of his daughter this too has a negative impact on her relationships and her own self image and confidence. The message to Fathers is: there is no such thing as too much positive attention as it relates to giving compliments to your daughter. Give love, it makes the world a happier place. I call every brown girl I meet a "Pretty Brown Girl". You never know, it could be the first time that they will ever hear those simple yet powerful words. ~Corey Crawley, Co-Founder Pretty Brown Girl

Indeed, it could very well be the very first time they may have ever heard these loving words.  So fear not dads...and moms!  The word beautiful continues to be a term of endearment.  So feel free to use it recklessly.  Now lets focus on removing words like stupid from the parenting vernacular...ijs.                                                                              

About Pretty Brown Girl
Founded in 2010, Pretty Brown Girl, LLC, is a company whose mission is to encourage girls to celebrate the beautiful shades of brown while inspiring positive self-esteem and confidence. In addition to the Pretty Brown Girl T-Shirt line, the brand includes "Laila", the first ever Pretty Brown Girl doll, along with accessories, programs and curriculum.

An open and honest blog about what matters most...children and families!!!


  1. I not only agree with the President's comments I loudly echo them. Both girls are BEAUTIFUL The truth hurts and let's hope that writing about it helped alleviate the pain.

    1. I agree with you Anonymous...both girls are absolutely beautiful. I encourage every parent to speak of and to their children with the descriptive terms of endearment used by our HANDSOME President;)